If you’ve come to this post looking for objectivity and an in-depth analysis of Vampire Weekend’s return then I would advise you to venture elsewhere, this is not the place for it. This is the place for gushing and wild exclamations of joy.

They really could not have timed this release much better, I am in a seriously Vampire Weekend-y mood and there’s only so many times you can listen to Contra consecutively before you have to tell yourself to stop. What’s even better is that HOLY SHIT THESE SONGS ARE INCREDIBLE.

I wasn’t even expecting anything this good either, I was expecting them to be jarring and weird and different and a bit crap but that I would come to love them in time anyway. I mean I thought Contra was an absolute mess for like 18 months. I was perfectly willing to accept that these would be growers again. They are not growers. They are in your face look at how fucking awesome we are-ers.

Diane Young, a great song with a terrible terrible name, is pretty much all those things I was expecting from the new releases. It’s jarringly different, completely insane and absolutely not even a tiny bit crap. I wouldn’t even know how to describe this song, what genre is it? Is it actually indie? Because it’s pretty damn surf-y, very electro-y and a little bit Prince-y. That sounds like an absolutely nightmarish mix but somehow it still works and it still feels like Vampire Weekend, only they’ve just gone a bit mad it seems. The video also consists entirely of burning old cars, which I guess is somehow symbolic of how they’ve gone a little bit off the wall but are still totally indie and hipster and love old things.

Step, the other half of their new double A-side, is worlds apart from it’s compatriot. It’s much closer to Contra but with hints of the electro-ness that’s all over Diane Young. Mostly it’s just pretty though. Really, really pretty. Achingly so. It sounds like it should be taken straight from Annie Hall or something – it has some weirdly distant and aged sound that’s really just all kinds of wonderful. I envision a quirky, Zooey Deschanel filled rom-com futue for this one, not a fate I’d wish on anyone. The end is totally weird though.

If I had to choose between the two, which I’d rather not since they’re both pretty brilliant, I’d probably have to go for Step. Actually, wait, I just listened to Diane Young again and it’s definitely the better one. No, wait, no it isn’t, Step is much better now I’ve listened to it again. No, I can’t decide, deal with it.

Honestly, these guys are just wiping the floor with pretty much every other indie artist right now. They’re so far above the competition it’s just frightening. The two songs show a hint of coherency but not a massive amount, and, honestly, I don’t care. If they released a structural mess of an album filled with songs as good as these I’d still give it 5 stars. I’d give it all the stars.